


fleeting waves

by orphan_account



Category: Free!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Episode 12 - A Swim Off in a Foreign Land!, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-23
Updated: 2014-12-23
Packaged: 2018-03-02 23:10:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,156
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2829407
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Haru?” Deep blue eyes shift minutely to stare at him, then back at the wall. When Haru doesn’t move an inch from his position, Rin drops the shirt currently in his hands and turns around to face him. At that, Haru drops the zipper he’d been playing with and wraps his arm around his legs, hunching over, shoulders tense. Rin sighs.</p>
<p>“Hey.” Haru looks over to him once more. Rin opens his arms. “C’m’ere.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	fleeting waves

**Author's Note:**

  * For [gaze_universe](https://archiveofourown.org/users/gaze_universe/gifts).



> Part of the Harurinharu Christmas Exchange 2014, for gaze_universe. I hope you like it, and happy holidays! :)

Rin sighs as he opens his suitcase, placing his cap on the dresser before he settles himself in front of the mess of clothes that greet him. Behind him, on the other side of the room, Haru is sitting down in front of his own suitcase stuffed with his belongings. The room is quiet, both of them lost in their own worlds.

Once Rin had headed back to their hotel room, he’d found Haru sitting on the bed, already in his pyjamas, a light cotton t-shirt and shorts, fiddling with the hem of his shirt and looking out the window absently. He looked good, as always, even with his hair mussed from their travel (in fact, it only added to the hotness, Rin thought), and Rin had blushed a bit at the thought before gathering himself, because now was not the time. When he’d explained to him the situation, loudly claiming his side of the bed along the way to cover up his embarrassment, Haru had simply blinked up at him and nodded, getting up and heading for his suitcase in order to unpack. He’d still had that slightly lost look in his eyes, the one Rin had noticed him sporting ever since he’d knocked on his door back in Iwatobi and had dragged him out of his cocoon of safety for Australia.

Scratch that; Rin had seen that glaze haunting Haru’s eyes ever since he’d placed his foot on the pool floor and stopped in his race during regionals.

Even now, as Rin folds (or tries to) his clothing and places them in the dresser, he remembers what little Haru had told him as they’d walked around Sydney and later visited Russell and Lori, and what Makoto had told him over text. He knew something was wrong, that Haru was definitely not fine, as Makoto had told him (albeit in a slightly less blunt manner). But Rin only knew the surface of the problem, as in that there had been a fight between Haru and Makoto during the festival, and that it was bad enough that Haru had apparently run away and ignored all of Makoto’s calls later on that night. Judging from the recent events at regionals, Rin could guess what the fight was about.

Rin subtly glances over to Haru. He’s sitting in front of his open suitcase, legs folded up to his chest and one arm wrapped around them, the other fiddling with the zipper of his trunk as he rests his head on his knees and stares at the wall in front of him listlessly. His belongings remain untouched, signaling that Haru has been doing nothing but stare at that wall for the past five minutes. Rin’s heart clenches in his chest at the sight. Sure, Haru’s aloof most days, but he’s never seen him like this before, so comatose-like. He hates it.

“Haru?” Deep blue eyes shift minutely to stare at him, then back at the wall. When Haru doesn’t move an inch from his position, Rin drops the shirt currently in his hands and turns around to face him. At that, Haru drops the zipper he’d been playing with and wraps his arm around his legs, hunching over, shoulders tense. Rin sighs.

“Hey.” Haru looks over to him once more. Rin opens his arms. “C’m’ere.”

Haru looks conflicted for a bit, but shuffles towards Rin anyway, ending up with his each of his legs bent on either side of Rin’s waist and fingers cautiously gripping his jacket as Rin wraps his arms around him in a hug, Haru’s head resting on one of his shoulders. They stay like that for a while, quiet, until Rin speaks up.

“You…” he starts, then falters, clears his throat. Rin’s not the best at heart to hearts. He’s much more familiar with confrontations in yells, but for Haru, he’ll try his best. Them not looking directly at each other helps, too.

“You know I’ve always admired you, right? You’re always so sure of yourself, and seeing that confidence of yours, well – it’s always helped me move forward. Not only me, I think; Rei, and Nagisa, and Makoto, too. I mean, I haven’t hung out with you guys lately, but I could see it, whenever we met up. That’s why it’s hard for me – and everyone – to see you like this.” Haru doesn’t answer, merely hiding his face in the crook of Rin’s neck and wrapping his fingers more tightly around Rin’s jacket. Rin gulps when he feels Haru’s hot breath against his skin, and squeezes his arms a bit more in reassurance.

“You helped me last year, when I came back to Japan, even though I was an asshole to you, and everyone else, and I’m grateful. Thank you.” Rin pauses. He knows he isn’t the gentlest person in the world; he’s rather brash on good days and downright vulgar on his worst days, but right now he tries his best to make his voice as soothing as possible. “So let me help you this time. Talk to me.”

It won’t do any good to scream at Haru. A twinge of guilt passes through Rin as he remembers their confrontation after regionals; the shouting, and Haru angrily slamming his fist on the lockers.

There is more silence, and Rin waits patiently. A quivery breath escapes Haru, and Rin supresses a shiver at that, but doesn’t do anything other than rub his hands in what he hopes is a comforting manner along Haru’s back, until he hears Haru mumble something into his neck.

“What?”

Haru shift his head a bit, his nose brushing Rin’s neck as he settles once more, head now turned to the side, under Rin’s chin.

“I…” he says, quiet, then wavers, fingers moving along Rin’s jacket to play with the hem of it. “I had a fight with Makoto.” Rin hums in acknowledgment.

“Yeah.”

“He…” Haru gulps, presses his legs against Rin’s sides, tries to curl into himself. “He’s going to Tokyo. For university.” Another shivery breath, against Rin’s collarbone this time. “He’s leaving.” Haru lifts his head to look at Rin, and Rin can see the blur of emotions in his blue eyes, swirling up a storm. Haru’s grip on his jacket tightens, and suddenly words spill from his mouth, an unbidden flow. “He’s leaving, and he knows what he’s doing, he has a dream, just like everyone else, like you, and I – I don’t know, I don’t know what I want, everyone keeps telling me to find a dream, but I _can’t_ , and –” Rin’s heart breaks a bit at the raw way words tumble from Haru’s lips, because _oh_ , he’s never heard Haru sound this way, him who always thinks before he speaks, who's always so composed, this is what’s been plaguing Haru’s mind all this time, and things are really not ok.

“Hey. Hey, hey,” Rin says, removing his hands from Haru’s back to place them against his arms, moving down from his shoulders, until he reaches Haru’s trembling fingers and pries them off from his shirt, linking them with his own. “This is what this trip is for. Help you think things over, sort whatever’s going on in that thick head of yours. A sight you’ve never seen before, right?” He laughs a bit, blushes, and tightens his grip against Haru’s hands. “This is what we’re here for. And I’m right here.”

He moves his hands back up, cupping Haru’s jaw, fingers splayed against the side of his head, brushing his dark hair, and he leans forward until their foreheads touch, both of them gazing into each other’s eyes. Haru gulps, and hesitates, but holds Rin’s gaze and brings his own hands up, mapping the skin of Rin’s torso through his shirt with his fingers until they reach his collarbone, where they continue their path to the back of Rin’s neck and play with the falling strands of ruby red hair. They both shiver when they feel their breaths mingling, Haru’s deep ones with Rin’s own softer ones, lips close enough to touch, and Rin starts to feel hot, warmth slowly enveloping his entire body. If the rising heat on Haru’s cheeks Rin can feel through his fingers is any indication, Haru’s feeling the same way.

Then Haru speaks up, closes his eyes for a second before blinking them back open, blue eyes boring into red ones.

 “But you’ll leave too. Just like you did before, and like Makoto will, and–” A small crease appears in between Haru’s brows, his face twists, and Rin’s never seen him like this, so close to… crying, broken, maybe, he’s not sure, but he doesn't like the look on his face.

“I’m here now, aren't I?” is all he says, rubbing his thumbs against Haru’s warm cheeks. “And Makoto’s there for you too. He’s your best friend. Being far away won’t change that between you guys, right?” Rin takes a deep breath and continues.

“Listen. I didn't know you felt this way. I didn’t listen to you when… after your race. I’m sorry.” Haru looks to the side and doesn’t say anything,  continues playing with Rin’s hair, and Rin can feel every little movement, every press of fingers against his neck, in between strands of his hair, the heat of his legs hitched up against his sides, warming him to the core.

“I was just talking about your potential as a competitive swimmer, because you _do_ have it, anyone can see that, but,” he sighs, and feels his cheeks getting redder than they already are, “it’s a bit selfish of me, but I always thought that wherever I went, you’d be right ahead of me. I mean, you’ve always pushed me to my limits, even when we were younger. So when I decided I’d go for professional swimming after school, I figured you’d be right by me, you know? But, if that’s not what you want, then…”

Haru glances back at him before he tilts his head down and lets go of the back of Rin’s neck, bringing his hands back to rest in between them, curling and uncurling his fingers. Rin brings his own now free hands to flit against Haru’s bare legs, feeling the light hairs on them, and he feels Haru press closer. The warmth he feels is growing, like embers slowly being stoked to form a calm fire, but he feels a bit numb.

Rin stops moving, backs away, and at the small confused and hurt sound he hears coming from Haru at the loss, quickly takes one of his hands in reassurance. Haru looks up at him, brows scrunched up in confusion, and Rin’s breath hitches slightly, because he’d hadn't really taken a good look at him until now, and Haru is gorgeous, clothes a bit wrinkled from all their moving, face warm and eyes a bit brighter than before, losing their previous cloudiness, and that’s a good sign, right?

Rin stands up, not letting go of Haru’s hand, and tilts his head towards the bed without a word, other than a timid scratch of his head as he averts his eyes, embarrassed.

“I was getting kind of numb, sitting on the floor.” Haru also blushes, the red of his cheeks darkening, but he follows him, and Rin lets go of Haru while he chucks off his jacket and his socks before he grabs his hands again and they settle on the mattress, lying on their sides and facing each other.

This time, they’re even closer to each other than before, and Haru has his legs tangled up in between Rin’s, and Rin can feel Haru’s warmth even more now that he’s in only his t-shirt, chest pressed to chest, and Rin decides to wrap an arm around Haru’s waist, to which Haru answers by dragging one foot along Rin’s leg, his bare toes tickling the skin they graze. They both revel in each other for a while, their hearts beating a bit faster against each other and bodies tingling with warmth and nervous excitement at the newness of this situation, quiet breaths mingling and hands wandering hesitantly underneath clothes.

Rin ducks his head in between the crevice where Haru’s neck meet his collarbone, and Rin feels a small shudder thrumming through Haru’s body when he lets out a puff of air against his skin. Haru’s hands flit underneath Rin’s shirt, the cool press of fingers skimming along the stark contrast of his warm stomach, right over the edge of his pants.

“I don’t know what I want,” is what Haru says after a moment. “Everyone keeps saying they’re expecting great things from me, that they can’t wait to see me on the starting blocks of the pool, internationally, but,” and Rin can hear him getting upset, “I don’t _know_ if I want that, to swim for times. I’ve always swum for myself, and for my friends, and that was it. Now everyone’s pushing this dream onto me that I’m not sure I want, even Makoto, and,” Haru makes a frustrated sound and stops. Rin’s never heard him speak that much all at once before.

“It’s – it’s okay to not know what you want just yet,” Rin answers, licking his lips nervously before he decides to snuggle further against Haru, his nose brushing along Haru’s neck, arm tight around his waist. “You can swim, competitively or not, or, you don’t have to swim at all! You can decide to do whatever you want. You draw, right?” He’s so close that his lips touch Haru’s skin when they move as he speaks, and Haru lets out a soft breath, lifting a hand to trace patterns against Rin’s arm with his fingers. Rin starts to feel the warmth in his body spread even more, and to one place in particular, and he reddens, fidgeting a bit.

“I – not just me, but Makoto, too – we want you to find something for yourself. Haru, you can’t just wait for your dream to hit you, like that; you’ve got to look for it.”

“That’s what Makoto said,” Haru replies, and Rin lifts his head from his cocoon, staring at the sad frown on Haru’s face, his lips twisting downwards. Rin brushes a finger along those lips, and Haru parts his lips slightly, letting out another soft breath. “When he said that, I thought he just wanted me to swim, like everyone else.”

“Makoto’s a fucking saint, he would never push expectations onto you,” Rin says, grinning. “When did he ever do something to make you think that?” Haru blinks, once, twice, in answer, then mumbles, bringing his hands back up to play with Rin’s hair.

“I don’t like fighting with Makoto.” Rin sighs, rubbing a hand up and down along Haru’s side.

“Sometimes fights are necessary. Not always," he supplies, rolling his eyes when he recalls all the stupid tiffs he has with Sousuke, "But Makoto wasn’t fighting against you, you know. He was fighting for you. He just wants you to be happy. He worries and cares about you.” Rin says, remembering the text Makoto had sent him. He then bites his lips, and flushes bright once again. “Like I do,” he finishes, embarrassed but honest.

Haru’s eyes widen minutely, and he stays quiet for a while. Rin gets flustered, until he hears a whispered, “I care about you too,” and Rin hears the unspoken message behind those words, the same one he'd tried to convey with his own, and then Haru’s moving even closer than Rin thought was possible, his warmth engulfing him, every contact between bare skin sending sparks through their bodies.

Their hands wander once more, touching where they can, under shirts, until those become cumbersome and are removed, and then it’s wonder in their eyes and stains of red painted on pale cheeks as both quietly admire each other, even if they’ve seen each other like this more than once, just not under this light, not like this. Then it’s back to fleeting caresses, along their necks and collarbones, arms, backs, shoulders, fingers skimming under strands of hair and tracing paths over skin as if to memorize each and every curve, dip and muscle of their bodies, legs brushing up and hooking around each other, all of these gentle ripples of movement against each other, toes curling at the sensation, and it’s an all-consuming fire they feel, heating their bodies with a familiar warmth. Rin can feel the pit of his stomach coil in pleasure, and he flushes when Haru presses up closer against him, a warmth similar to his making its presence known against his leg.

“Rin…” Haru murmurs.

They hold each other, looking into each other’s eyes, both sporting similar flushes to their cheeks and breathing deeply, the heat of their bodies mingling between and around them. Rin’s mouth is parted invitingly, his hair splayed against the sheets in all directions. Haru’s eyes are half-lidded, his hands on Rin’s back a cool contrast to the clammy warmth of his skin, and he’s about to say something else when he yawns.  Rin imitates him, the action contagious, then lets out a laugh. Haru’s lips quirk up in a half-smile, and Rin’s heart melts a bit. He turns his head around to look at the clock, the blinking lights showing 10:54 PM. Rin quickly does the math and realises it’s a bit earlier here in Sydney than it is in Iwatobi, which explains the sudden onslaught of fatigue they both feel.

“… How about we sleep now. We can figure this out tomorrow morning,” Rin whispers. Haru nods in acknowledgement, closing his eyes and humming in contentment, looking peaceful and at ease. Rin knows – and so does Haru – that his plight isn’t over, not yet, but Haru’s opened up to him tonight, he’s moving forward, they’re both moving forward, and that’s what matters for now.

Rin lets go of his hold on Haru briefly to turn off the lamp on the bedside table, and soon turns around to resume cuddling. Haru’s moved to rest onto his back, arm stretched out, so Rin presses to Haru’s side and drapes an arm over his stomach and a leg in between Haru’s, his head nestling in the crook between arm and shoulder. Just as he closes his eyes, he hears Haru murmur,

“Rin… thank you.”

Rin simply smiles and buries his face further into his makeshift pillow.

And as Rin falls asleep, light snores falling from his lips, Haru looks up at the ceiling, and thinks to himself. He might still not know what to do in the future, but he’s sure of one thing. Wherever his future may take him, he hopes Rin will stay in the picture. He decides he’ll tell Rin this first thing in the morning.

At that thought, Haru finally closes his eyes, content, soon following Rin in his quiet slumber.

The suitcases lie opened and forgotten at the foot of the dresser.


End file.
